Marrisa Modell


Today I give in

 

Today, I give in

I let go of fighting

Notions that I am not worthy

I rely on friends to guide my heart

Where it is blind

 

Today, I accept

How my thighs shake when I stand

Unable to support my weight

I lift the child, but my knees

Crumble, like ozymandias

 

Today, I tear at

Bloody scabs, shed tears at

Metal scales, face fears

In the kitchen, Reminding myself

I paid to exist in my own apartment

 

Today, I celebrate

Hatred I’ve accrued

Join the crowd in their trench

Aim gravel at eye level

Throw dirt in my throat

 

Today, I lay in bed

Silent

Tired.

Done.

Gone.